WELCOME 2017!!!

Happy new year to all my esteemed readers!

I’m glad we all made it.

We have crossed over to take over!

UNUSUAL SPOTS AND TRICKS TO CATCH A HUSBAND THIS XMAS!

It's Christmas again, the time when eligible bachelors travel to the village to find a wife. Most men prefer getting a wife from the village as they believe that the city girls are over exposed and promiscuous therefore not a good wife material. 

On the other hand, mothers prefer getting a wife for their sons from a good family from their village so that they will be sure of the girl's lineage and character.

You have been trekking the length and breadth of Lagos all through this year with no man asking whether you are for sale or for rent. 

Babes if you are still in the city, pack your bags and head to the village straight away, let's beat them to their game!

MY DAUGHTER AND I

My daughter is two years plus and highly active. She always sides with her father against me. The other day I was arguing with my husband over a political issue and this small aunty got down from her daddy’s laps ,rushed to where I was sitting and began to hit me. I just folded her in a heap and flung back at her daddy.

 Both of them charged at me and I dived under the bed!

HOW TO ARRANGE YOUR WARDROBE FOR QUICK AND EASY DRESSING.

Getting something to wear these days is becoming a herculean task for me. I normally start from one end of the wardrobe to the other end scanning through clothes to find my choice. When I reach one end, I will go back to the beginning, back and forth till I run out of time, then I yank down one and dash out.*sighs*

One day, I sat down and thought of how to get dressed easily and look chic at the same time without stress.

WEEKEND GIST-DIARY OF A 30 YR OLD SINGLE LADY EP 4.

I felt my phone vibrating beside the pillow, the time is 5.30am in the morning. I drowsily picked the call and it was my mum.

*Hello mum*

*Nne I want you to come home immediately* she said with urgency in her voice

*Ah! Mum is anything wrong?* I said sitting up and wiping sleep off my eyes

*Yes! Something is very wrong* she stressed

*I hope nobody died? I asked with fear in my voice

*just come home first* she insisted ending the call. I tried calling her back but her line was switched off.

MY NEW LOOK!

Hellooo anybody home?,

So sorry to be missing in action for a very long time, i was working on a project and it took almost all my time 'cos i have a target to meet..

I promise it won't happen again, really missed you guys!  thanks for the calls and mails, i do appreciate, God bless you guys real good!

In another news Rosyandchic blog is one year old today yayyy!!*singing* what shall I say unto the lord, all I have to say is thank you lord……..thank you lord, thank you lord ,all I have to say is thank you lord.

OUR MATHS TEACHER EP 2.

 

I cast a glance at Amaka, she looked unperturbed. I shifted with unease on the chair looking at uncle Ben fearfully. He walked  towards the television set and slotted a disc into the VCR. Picking up the remote, he turned back, regarded us for a second and sat down heavily in between  Amaka and i.

Then….. he stretched his arms on the sofa behind our shoulders with a look of satisfaction on his face. I whimpered  silently cringing from his arms on my neck.

OUR MATHS TEACHER

Uncle Ben  asked me to help him carry something to his house* Amaka said excitedly . Uncle Ben is our mathematics teacher. A young man in his mid thirties.He is single, always looking serious and hardly smiles. i blame mathematics 'cos maths no dey smile!

As for me i want to partake of this opportunity as well so that if the teacher dash her mark, i go follow collect my own too.

* Amy i'm going with you so i can help you carry the loads*

*Errmmm........ he said it's only me he wants oo* she said looking as if she is regretting ever telling me.

*But only you can't carry the load na........... i just want to help out* i pleaded with her

DISCOVER HOW TO BE LUCKY IN LIFE!

The secret to being lucky isn’t about winning huge pots of cash…..it’s about  perspective, hard work, self belief and making the most out of the wonderful blessings already surrounding you.

Luck is made not found. The luck that is *stumbled across* is very often fools’ gold in the hands of a person who doesn’t know what to do with it. If you believe in yourself and your abilities, and follow the ideas outlined below, you will be having lucky breaks:

HAVE THEY REALLY RECONCILED?

I saw this picture of pastor Chris and his wife two days ago on Facebook with the title *the media will not carry this, thanks to all those who prayed tirelessly for this reunion*. I searched the internet this morning for a confirmation and i saw a post on naija loaded on 22nd May carrying this same picture confirming that indeed the man of God and his wife have reconciled.

I sincerely hope this is true, i was heart broken when i heard  of their divorce. Let's get something straight here, i'm not a member of Christ embassy but i'm a member of the Christendom right? so it's one for all, all for one gerrit?  

HOW TO TURN HEADS AND GET PEOPLE TO NOTICE YOU!!

Have you ever being in a place or room and a babe enters and all eyes turned towards her?. It’s as if she filled the whole place with her presence and others can’t take their eyes off her.What makes her so noticeable, is it her look or her outfit? 

It’s simple………. Poise and confidence.

Cultivating the right qualities and presenting yourself in the right ways goes a long way towards turning peoples’ head. Wanna turn heads? follow these rules:

STOP WAITING FOR PRINCE CHARMING!!

Generally, girls daydream about being swept away by a handsome wealthy man and living happily ever after,yeah that's a good dream but it’s highly important that you realize the difference between fairly tale and reality.

Most girls are desperately seeking for prince superman.Requirements: tall, dashing, handsome, romantic, great in bed, loves to give massages, rocket scientist, perfect teeth, buys flowers every Wednesday, does the dishes, makes the bed, always looking dapper, exactly like my father, exactly NOT like my father! haba!

EASY TIPS AND TRICKS TO ACHIEVING HEALTHY AND PROFESSIONAL NAILS

Most of us are ignorant when it comes to nail art or just simple things as painting nails neatly.

There are some easy tips and tricks which can help you achieve a healthy looking and professional quality nails. 

You can also do your nails just like salon quality. Here are the top tips  every girl must know:

HOW TO FIRE UP YOUR PASSION!

So many people go through life just existing and have never really lived because they never pursued their passion.This is an inspirational booster to induce your nerves to find out your innate passion and to pursue it. 

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Following your passion changes your life and the lives of those around you. It makes life exciting. It inspires your team. It transforms the grind of work into an invigorating challenge.

Don’t go another day, week, month or year without finding and harnessing your passion.

How to discover your passion:

TIPS TO LOOK FRESH AND RADIANT AFTER A SLEEPLESS NIGHT!

Have you stayed up late working, partying or watching movies? Does your skin look dull and tired?.While a cup of coffee can boost your energy, it won’t give you a fresh look. 

Generally, people are perceived as less healthy and less attractive by others when they don’t get enough rest. If you have to go to work, have a job interview or a date the next day, you would want to look your best.

Follow these steps to appear less tired and cover up the signs of poor sleep:

MONDAY INSPIRE TO ASPIRE!

An old farmer wrote a letter to his innocent son in prison: 

“This year I’m unable to plant potatoes because I don't have the strength to dig into the ground. I know if you were here you would’ve helped me.”

Son replied:

“You idiot dad, don’t dig into the ground, I have hidden the guns there.”

WELCOME TO MAY

                 

                                                 

May the Lord go ahead of you and make every crooked places straight in Jesus name amen! Isaiah 45:2.

                                           HAPPY NEW MONTH! 

from me to you,

sylvia

AUNTY REMEMBER TO PUT THE *L* SIGN OO!

I was busy in the afternoon working on a post when my little sister that lives with me came into the room. She is thirteen years old and the last child of the family.

*Aunty ?*

*Yes? 

When I didn’t hear anything from her , I looked up . *what is it?*

She hesitated for a while , *errm aunty, are you still going to buy the car you said we will use to travel to the village?*

I thought for a while and remembered that I told her that I’m going to buy a car before June, and that we will use the car to travel to the village. chei see me see wahala!

TOP 4 MISTAKES THAT MAKES YOU TO LOOK OLDER!

As a woman gets older(from the age of 30 upwards) she  tends to change most of her lifestyle such as dress sense,diet,relationships etc

It is equally important that you watch how you look facially so as not to look too old for  your age. To avoid this, watch out for these mistakes:

THE LATEST EXQUISITE AND UNIQUE FRAGRANCE IN TOWN!

Hello guys,

I want to introduce to you the new fragrance in town and that is OUD perfumes, exclusively distributed in Nigeria by sapphire scents.

In my opinion, fragrances made from oud are the best anyone can use. 

If you are allergic to other regular perfumes, then a perfume made of oud is for you.

WHY ARE MY INNER THIGHS DARK?,CAUSES AND REMEDY.

Having a dark or black inner thighs can be very embarrassing to both men and women. People will associate it with poor hygiene or even previous infections from sexually transmitted diseases whereas this might not be the case.

Causes;

SAY NO TO STRECH MARK!!!

This post is focusing primarily on stretch mark on the lower abdomen during pregnancy.

When my sister was pregnant, her tummy was an eyesore, I mean you can’t look at it without vomiting. I interviewed her and discovered what caused it. Then I went on a quest on how to avoid it .

CHEi MTN BETTER ME DON PEPPER ME OH!!

 I dey my own  o, dey think about my life when this message from MTN entered my phone

MTN better me, recharege #2015 to get 2015mb data. Valid for 30 days*

The offer sounds good so I decided to try it.

I started running around looking for money( na im pain me pass). Finally I was able to raise the money, I subscribed and 2015mb ie 2 gb was given to me , I happy well well.

I DON TAYA!

Weekend gist would have come up today but couldn't make it. 

No light , no fuel.

 Ah don taya. My battery is red already.

pls bear with me

luv y'all

sylvia

WEEKEND GIST: DIARY OF A 30 YR OLD SINGLE LADY EPISODE 3

It was on a Sunday and I was in a church service. The sermon was very interesting as the pastor preached on faith. The part wey I hear well well was about husband lol. abeg no blame me na the thing wey dey give me sleepless night.

He said that if you are believing God for a husband, you should go and buy wedding gown or your husband's suit and begin to speak to it.

WEEKEND GIST: THE DIARY OF A 30 YR OLD SINGLE LADY EPISODE 2

I was en route Lagos from the east in a luxurious bus. Luckily a guy was sitting beside me. You know as a babe, if you are going on a long journey, it’s always wise to sit beside a guy. 

This is ‘cos you never can tell whether you two will strike a chord, as a single girl on the loose na hehe. Above all, you are sure of food and other goodies on the way if the guy is generous.

Sometimes your plan will backfire o hehe. This reminds me of an ugly experience I had one certain time.

HOW TO SANITIZE THE VAGINA NATURALLY

As women we cherish our vagina and will do everything to make sure the area is neat and hygeinic.. *whispers, please don't tell my grandma that i called it vagina o hehe.*

 if you dare call it vagina in my house, my grandma will abuse you eh .*i lago na iyi*, i mebigo* ( you have gotten spoilt) she will be shouting with great annoyance.

 Even my mum will join her,* during our own time we don't call it by it's name*.

 okay mummy what do we call it then? i asked her. Before she could answer me, the fiery grandmother cuts in * call it laguus( pronounced as la goods). i laughed.

WEEKEND GIST:THE DIARY OF A 30YR OLD SINGLE LADY EPISODE 1

The hustle for husband became real after my youth service. All my girlfriends were either getting married or engaged. Those who are neither married nor engaged already have a man who they swear must marry them or…………………

One day I was in a bus when my eyes caught a church banner displayed along the road and it reads:

 *The return of his glory. Need a husband? Come and collect one.*

WELCOME TO 2016!!

MAY THIS YEAR BE BETTER THAN LAST YEAR FOR YOU

MAY YOUR LIFE BE FILLED WITH LAUGHTER AND HAPPINESS 

MAY EVERY TEARS OF SORROW YOU SHED LAST YEAR BE REPLACED WITH TEARS OF JOY THIS YEAR

MAY YOU NEVER LOSE A LOVED ONE THIS YEAR

MAY ALL YOUR DREAMS AND ASPIRATIONS BECOME A REALITY THIS YEAR

THIS IS MY PRAYER FOR YOU THIS YEAR AND BEYOND IN JESUS MIGHTY NAME AMEEEN!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

from me to you.

sylvia.